My experience of Covid-19

I couldn’t taste anything. I wondered if I’d forgotten to put more coffee in when I refilled the mug. It was like drinking hot water. I went downstairs and chugged pure lime juice. I was aware of something acidic in my mouth, but it could have been lime, lemon, or hydrochloric. I squirted air freshener and cologne all round the bathroom, but couldn’t smell a thing.

I broke the news to my wife and we trudged off to the test centre. Imagine snorting a line of cat hair and you’ll have some idea how it feels to have a cotton bud jammed up your nose just a little too far. After much sneezing and retching, we went home. The text came through the next day to say we had tested positive for Covid-19 and had to stay at home for ten days. Fortunately, the local supermarket delivers, or we’d have been mixing up all the things at the back of the pantry we never got round to eating. Not that it would have bothered me. In fact, having no sense of taste was a good opportunity to use up all the things I don’t like.

I had a pre-existing condition in my left shoulder. I thought it was just an unfortunate coincidence that it flared up again when I had Covid, but the doctor said the virus often inflamed existing aches and pains.

I spent a couple of nights lying awake in agony. You get to thinking when you can’t sleep. As it was the main thing on my mind, I pondered the nature of pain. I can see that it’s useful sometimes – warning us not to touch things that are too hot, for example. But after I’d acknowledged there was a problem with my shoulder, I couldn’t see why I needed to be kept awake all night by this insistent throbbing. What evolutionary purpose does that serve? Or, if you’re on the other side of that particular fence, how is this part of a loving God’s plan?

The doctor prescribed industrial strength painkillers and sleeping tablets. For three days, I hardly left my bed. In a very odd way, I kind of enjoyed this. I drifted in and out of sleep, sliding between fever dreams and regular dreams, never sure which was which. It was pretty trippy.

Apart from shoulder pain and existential crisis, it was like flu. Aching muscles. High temperature. Extreme fatigue.

After a while, I was able to get out of bed. I was still exhausted. Emailing took a long time. I opened an email. Had to take a break. I read half of it. Another break. I read the rest of it. Little lie down. Replying to it. Maybe tomorrow.

I’m still tired, but more or less functioning again. Don’t ask me to compete in the World’s Strongest Man any time soon, but I can work. I can also share stories with other Covid veterans. Did you lose your sense of smell? Yeah, for three days. Fever of 38 degrees. I got up to 39 at the worst point. If anyone who hasn’t had the disease tries to interrupt, we cut him down with a, “You don’t know what it was like, man. You weren’t there!”

I had a scare last weekend when I was eating my lunch and couldn’t taste anything. But I was eating a plant-based fake chicken product, so what did I expect?